The Chicks’ Jerk: a super-classy bachelorette party VHS!

The President and board members of The Bouillon Cube Karate Club are honored to present the six winners selected for the Chicks with Three Katas special Summer 2026 lineup.

Event sponsored by The Chicks’ Jerk. Following the major « Chorégraphie Cocottes » competi-tion, six chicks are vying for the top spot on the podium.

Every rival chick (RCA) athlete is tested.

01. – 02. – 03. – 04. – 05. – 06. – 07. – 08. – 09. – 10. – 11. – 12. – 13. – 14. – 15. – 16. – 17. – 18. 

The Chicks’ Jerk: a super-classy hens VHS! The Chicks’ Jerk on VHS (Voiceless Hens Show). Six ultra-chic chicks, all dressed in their finest feathers and enclosed within a coded enveloppe!

Pre-codified movements and the substitution of the karatekas’ full names with these codes ensure the jury’s complete impartiality. Thus, each identity finds itself encased in a codified shell as surely as the athletes in their soap bubble like aeronautical helmet and their kimono-style suits.

APOLOGIES

The jury wishes to apologize on behalf of two of the top winners in the « height » and « width » categories, who had to be disqualified from the « chicken bouillon cube » podium.

Chicken bouillon cube: a curated selection of eight, minus two disqualified for celebrating before the end of the contest—the first for appearing almost entirely naked and dancing instead of demonstrating her karate skills, the second for having used a levitation power worthy of a ninja endowed with extraterrestrial psychic-chick gifts.

Disqualified – 1*   RCA 05/08

Disqualified – 2     RCA 07/08

The former was disqualified for misbehavior—and not merely for failing to follow protocol: initiating a mock Capoeira-style warm-up dance is very disrespectful—while the later faced severe sanctions for using illegal alien psychic techniques.

Dedicated to Katerine, Poulet N. 728 120, album Les creatures, Barclay, 1999.

* She danced to Joyce Moreno’s ‘Aquarius,’ which annoyed the judges and contributed to her disqualification, given that the official music was supposed to be a tribute to Philippe Katerine’s song ‘Poulet’. We later learn that this choice was not only a feminist statement but also stemmed from the contestant’s extraterrestrial origins. We also learn that the contestant was not ‘nearly naked’ but clad in a shell that mimicked human contours—for had she been naked, she would have appeared as an octopus rather than a humanoid chicken. Such is the state of poetry today, influenced by AI. In this respect, her ‘leotard’ wasn’t all that different from those of the other contestants, all of whom were extraterrestrial bombshells. She alone will remain excluded—disqualified due to a diplomatic faux pas—since capoeira is the war chant of that motley crew of extraterrestrial pseudo-chicks and very real, invasive octopuses of visual poetry.